Category Archives: Skull

Skull of the day

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THE BATALLION, Head Up High  (2010, Dark Essence)

The skull:
The Batallion might win a few battles now and then, but they sure won’t win any spelling bees. But let’s look at that skull: it’s apparently being held up high, so we’ll take them at their word. There’s nothing very distinctive about it, except for those awesome teeth, which are bullets. “You goth fags can go fuck yourself with your prosthetic fangs,” says this skull, “’cause my dentist does BULLETS!”

The music:
The most notable thing about The Batallion is that their bassist played on the second and third Borknagar albums, albums which this Friar holds in high regard. Other members have played in Taake and Old Funeral, so you wonder why they’re devolving so significantly with this band? Head Up High might be professionally executed, and it doesn’t exactly fit into the ballcap-and-white-high-tops retrothrash scene, but it’s basically fourth generation thrash that you’ve heard a million times before. It’s like their favorite Sodom era is the punkier one (Masquerade in Blood, Get What You Deserve) and like they think thrash ‘n’ roll is something to exalt. Ah shit, they’re probably just out for a good time and looking for an excuse to get drunk. Go for it guys. (Speaking of “guys,” their first album is notable for having some interesting homoerotic references: it’s called Stronghold of Men and contains songs such as “The Spirit of Masculinity” and “Man to Man.” Hey, to each his own.)
— Friar Wagner

SKULL175

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BIGRIG, 10-4 Good Buddy (2009, demo)

The skull:
This one pretty much speaks for itself, no? What could I possibly add that would make this funnier? Nothing!

The music:
BigRig is a side project from Admiral Nobeard and Commodore RedRum of the second best pirate metal band of all time, Swashbuckle. As you might expect, BigRig play trucker metal, even if no one else does. The sound is basically goofy deathrock, like midperiod Entombed but better and funny on purpose. They’re a joke band, yeah, but BigRig (like Swashbuckle) are damned good at what they do, and they play this ridiculous shit like they mean it. The unexpected melody in “The Long Haul” almost approaches earnestness, even. I’m sure these guys know it’s a galactic waste of time to put any effort into a throw-away novelty band like BigRig, but they just can’t help doing it right. You have to respect that.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL174

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VEX, Thanatopsis (2010, Horror Pain Gore Death Productions)

The skull:
A cute little guy here with humongous eye sockets. Toothless, the skull has a look of surprise or desperation, or possibly both. Looks sort of like a child’s skull. Whatever the age, somebody forgot to bury the body properly. I’m assuming the tombstone-like stone behind it marks a gravesite, and the field it’s in hasn’t been mowed in quite some time. If I was hiking in this field I wouldn’t be able to resist picking up this skull and putting it into my backpack. After flicking the maggots off. Cool cover, one that looks like it could either be a mildly manipulated photograph or a really good bit of painted realism.

The music:
Considering the label this is on, I didn’t expect the music to be of such a refined, majestic sort. It’s from Texas but sounds like early/mid ’90s Swedish melodic death metal. I imagine they’re disciples of Eucharist and early Tiamat. Their guitars weave melodic themes and riffs that recall Dissection, Unanimated, Sacramentum, early Dark Tranquillity and early At the Gates, with vocals in a similar vein (seething, near-black metal rasps). They keep things raw on the production side, guitars are thin and hypnotic sounding, and the song arrangements are relatively complex, so they truly sound authentically olden — nowhere near as edgeless as most modern melodic death metal bands. Thanatopsis is very good for what Vex is trying to achieve. Some moments hint at a will for experimentation, so I’m curious to hear the follow up, Memorious. What do you know, a cool cover and some good music to go along with it!? Skulls be praised!
— Friar Wagner

SKULL173

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RITUAL SPIRIT, Ritual Spirit (2001, Shark)

The skull:
Lazy, ugly, and brown even by the depraved standards of Big Dumb Skulls, this is one of the saddest covers I’ve ever seen. What band could care so little about their art, what label be so unconcerned with success, to have settled on this image? It’s like a suicide note, this cover, anhedonia expressed through Photoshop. “We feel nothing. The world is without meaning. No one knows anyone, and we all die alone. Signed, Ritual Spirit.”

The music:
Unbelievably, indeed depressingly, I was not able to find even a single song by this band online. Shark Records released a lot of crap to be sure, but they were a big enough label that you’d think someone would have bought, liked, and memorialized it to YouTube, especially since the band was founded by some ex-member of Tyran Pace (known best as Ralf Scheeper’s first band). Almost every big dumb skull has left some musical mark on the internet, down to the most obscure and ephemeral artifacts of three decades past. Ritual Spirit, though, exists only as a collective dream, a half-remembered hallucination of middling power metal. Oblivion awaits us all, and one day the last person to have heard even Metallica will pass from this earth.
— Friar Johnsen

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RAM, Forced Entry  (2005, Black Path Metal)

The skull:
Another band that likes the concept of fusing animal horns onto a human skull, and it’s
usually ram horns that are favored (second favorite: bison horns), so this band is well-
named. The black and red makes an effective impact, complete with glowing red lights
emanating from the eye sockets. Pretty much looks how it sounds.

The music:
Swedish vocalists usually don’t come with much of an accent, not the way Italian or Greek
vocalists do, but this guy has a strange delivery, partly due to a weird accent that twists
every word into near-nonsense. He also ocassionally sounds influenced by the mid-range tones of Agent Steel’s John Cyriis and Sanctuary-era Warrel Dane (“Machine Invaders”), so the dude is clearly on the oddball side. His voice  gives Ram a unique edge, for better or worse. The rest of Ram play pretty cool traditional metal that finely walks the line between elder worship and the hungry spontaneity only rookies possess. You get songs with multiple parts, tempos and sections, and a whole lot of energy; stuff like “Machine Invaders,” “Infuriator,” and “Venom in My Veins” captures the interest well enough. Their lead guitar work is suitably blistering, some great tones and melodic choices that help the Ram cause quite a bit. There’s no one obvious root sound that is Ram’s favorite…I hear flavors of Japanese, Danish, German, British, Italian and U.S. heavy metal here, all on the raw, dark and heavy-handed side. A few moments get stuck in a plod, like the band isn’t quite sure where to go (the title track), but for the most part it’s a fun if totally easy listen. This definitely could have been released in 1985.
— Friar Wagner

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HOURGLASS SANDS OF ETERNITY, Journey to Infinity (2002, Secret Port)

The skull:
If there’s one thing that we Friars love on our metal covers as much as as a skull, it’s an hourglass, and the ludicrously named Hourglass Sands of Eternity brings it all together with this excellent double whammy. I love that either the headband or the skull was painted without regard for where the other would go, I love that the weirdly shaped skull is actually weeping sandy tears, I love that the bony leg on the right is broken, I love it all. And while watching an hourglass empty is about as far from a “journey” as you can get, this cover nevertheless communicates exactly what you’re gonna get from the music.

The music:
I will admit to owning an awful lot of discs like this: a hamhanded mix of true metal and progressive metal played badly and produced worse, but for whatever reason I never acquired a copy of this particular release. HSOE (as I’ll abbreviate them) are a Greek band, and Greek prog metal is almost never good, but it’s probably just dumb luck that a vendor I patronized back in the early 00s didn’t foist this one on me. I would have taken it in a heartbeat, based on the cover alone. The songs are dull, in that ponderous would-be-proggy way, and the singing is fairly bad, although certainly no worse than any of the playing. All in all, this squarely inhabits that dread zone of mediocrity where abide all those bands just good enough to not merit special scorn. But even though it’s been over ten years since this, the band’s only release, HSOE are allegedly still active, so there’s still time (har har) for them to salvage their reputation. Hopefully they try that with a skull, too.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL170

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GODS OF FIRE, Wrath of the Gods  (2004, Black Thirteen)

The skull:
Man, this one whips up one magickal psychedelic visage of a skull! Look into those eyes…weird organic matter, like black lava swirling and cooling, with what looks like elaborately sculpted smoke whirling up the sides, with teeth that are not human and some pretty good looking gums, considering the advanced state of decay this person has gone through by this point. This person with the teeth of a badger. And then, yes, lots of fire burning below, a recurring theme for many a skull album cover. The skull itself almost gets lost in all this madness.

The music:
Gods Of Fire sounds influenced by King Diamond, Sanctuary, Iron Maiden and Manowar. Unfortunately, listening to these eight songs and 53 minutes is a chore. Their hearts are in the right place, but it’s pretty low-rent stuff. Too many ham-fisted stabs at grandiosity (“Promethus Unbound”), some flat-out bad notes (the guitar themes that open “Nectar of the Gods”), and vocals that try for a wide range but are dull and powerless at every turn. Sometimes the musicianship is pretty good, despite weak spots, but there’s this overall void running throughout that makes it feel like parody. The recording is far too dry, which doesn’t help their cause. It’s frustrating to listen to a band reaching for golden heights only to come back with greasy scraps. I cheer for them with part of my heart while my entire brain says, “No…please…no.” On a fun little note, their second album is called Hanukkah Gone Metal. I am not kidding. Here’s a lyric from “No Gelt, No Glory”: “No Gelt No Glory baby / I let it ride on Gimel must walk away a winner now / No Gelt No Glory baby / If you want to play then baby gimme a ‘HEI!'” The first line goes “With the dreidel in my hand I give it a lucky whirl.” It’s sure more interesting than the stock-mythology lyrics running throughout Wrath of the Gods.
— Friar Wagner

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EMERALD STEEL, Emerald Steel (1990, Woodstock Discos)

The skull:
First you’re like, “What’s the worst he can do? Bite me? I can handle one fucking skull in a fight,” and then he shows up armed to the (grinning) teeth, and you’re like, “Aw, shit!”

The music:
How on earth have I never heard this before? I knew the name, and based on the cover, I assumed they were crappy NWOBHM. Instead, they’re more like a crappy Crimson Glory knock-off, which is exactly my kind of crap. Singer Wagner Geronymo (obviously his real name), a Brazilian transplant to Florida, has a strong, piercing high voice, and he delivers his lines with exactly the overblown theatricality you want in an act like this. His pitch sometimes doesn’t quite hit the mark, especially when he harmonizes, but when he lands it, he sounds great. The songs are not classics for the ages (see: “Sex Metal”), but they’re certainly better than a lot of other US power metal bands from the late 80s, comparing favorably with early Heir Apparent, Oracle, Sacred Oath, or others in that vein. If, like me, you already own all the classics, and all the second-tier guilty pleasures, and then all of the third tier junk from the heyday of American melodic metal, then it’s time to open a new tab, bring up eBay, and find yourself a Hot Metal bootleg of Emerald Steel, yet another band that deservedly fell through the cracks but is still kind of okay.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL168

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ELWING, War  (2005, Black Lotus)

The skull:
Assuming that this one-eyed skull is looking at a scene of war, he looks blank and unimpressed. The artwork is all scratchy and organic-ish, just some fun with Photoshop to help dress up an otherwise drab cover idea. Mission not accomplished. There are a whole subset of skull covers out there featuring one-eyed skulls, and this is one of the least remarkable. Just another band that’s got nothin’ in the way of cover ideas. (Their first album featured artwork depicting a helmeted, shielded, and sworded warrior standing atop a pile of skulls. Also none too original.)

The music:
Whole lotta gallop goin’ on, and quite a few Celtic/folk flavored rhythms and melodies. This Greek metal band worships at the altar of Blind Guardian and other such fantasy-laden, epic sorts of power metal bands. If you have any recollection at all of the Greek band Nemesis (I don’t), one of their members ended up in Elwing, and he brings their “Lost Humanity” song with him, which appears on this album. Highlight tracks? They’re all kind of similar in quality and structure. The vocals are mid-ranged and decent enough, and when he goes high he sounds strained. Or with tons of effects piled on. He’s gruff and forceful enough and has an okay range. Musically it’s solid and tight, nothing to sniff at, and the whole band perform with an earnestness that at least makes you appreciate their conviction. But Elwing isn’t offering anything that other, better bands haven’t, so there you go. Elwing gave it their best shot in the early and mid 2000s and died a pretty quick death. A casualty of the power metal war…
— Friar Wagner

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LEGACY OF HATE, Unmitigated Evil (2008, Maintain)

The skull:
There’s something off about the dimensions of this skull that makes me think it’s perhaps supposed to be a child’s. I guess plopping a kid’s skull in a pile of bones (or whatever) is pretty evil, although if that evil were totally unmitigated, I imagine there’d probably be a whole lot more skulls. And probably less foliage, which isn’t very evil at all.

The music:
Googling for information about this band, I turned up a lot of heavy metal references to “legacy of hate,” the phrase. It’s a Fight song. It’s a Celesty album. It’s a Hellfighter (aka: the singer from Xentrix’s band) single. And, of course, it’s this Austrian band. Usually when that sort of thing happens, it turns out the phrase is the title of a book or movie, or was part of some famous speech, but I can’t seem to find the source (unless all these groups were fans of the 60s TV western The Virginian), so I’m just going to assume that this is a phrase so utterly generic that it’s been coined dozens of times. Which is to say, it’s absolutely perfect for a band with a big dumb skull cover. Legacy of Hate are a melodic death metal band that are neither bad nor at all noteworthy. Just the same thing you’ve heard countless times before, done better and worse. They’re from Austria, but though I usually expect an off-kilter oddness from Austrian metal bands, Legacy of Hate don’t have a measure of quirk to spare. Straight up and down, these guys. If you love the first albums by In Flames and Dark Tranquillity, then you probably won’t dislike Legacy of Hate, but you’re almost certainly bored by the myriad bands who have tried to reinvent that wheel over the last 15 years or so, so while Legacy of Hate might pass the time inoffensively, that’s about as good as it’s gonna get.
— Friar Johnsen