BLASTANUS, Odd (2009, self-released)
Odd Firth is the disowned heir to the Vic Firth drumstick dynasty. His ouster from the family and the resulting loss of the family fortune compelled him to seek revenge on skulls by stabbing them in the eye sockets with his own custom made drumsticks. One such incident is depicted here. Fortunately for this particular skull, a drumstick in the eye socket is just the thing with which to kick off a lazy Sunday afternoon. Now if only Vic himself would ram one in the left socket and make it a complete stick-in-socket overload of a bonegasm. Also, this guy sports some of the finest choppers we’ve ever seen on a skull.
Here at Big Dumb Skulls, we’re often forced to acknowledge the above-average abilities of the average Finnish metal band. But we can’t keep giving every Finn-band a pass if their music stinks, and that brings Blastanus right into the firing line, because this is totally functionless death/grind, beyond whatever kicks it gives to the musicians involved. There was no need for them to share this entirely unentertaining album with the rest of the world. You can safely skip it. Interestingly, this album came out just before they added a saxophonist, which I’m sure made all the difference in their musical quality. (Yeah, right.)
— Friar Wagner