SKULL428

DIAVE, Akatastasia  (1998, demo)

The skull:
Well, it’s not the worst piece of computer-generated skull art we’ve ever seen. If you look closely, and use your imagination just a tiny bit, you can imagine strings of dental floss hanging from the skull’s uppers. Even in death, even in a lightning storm after death, flossing is so important. As that poster on your dentist’s wall says: “You don’t have to floss all of your teeth…just the ones you want to keep!”

The music:
The list of chintzy gothic/death/doom bands from mid ’90s Europe is endless. Enchantment…Cemetery of Scream…As Serenity Fates…Castle…Jesus, kill me now. I¬† love the Peaceville Three and various others in that vein, but what My Dying Bride, Paradise Lost and Anathema started in the early ’90s is not only un-toppable, but unfortunately became a playground for lesser bands to drag through the mud of crappy vocals, cheesy productions, dinky keyboards, and horrible wailing opera wenches. This long-forgotten Polish band were one of the most unremarkable of this sordid lot, but remark I shall. Diave are fourth-tier at best. Ham-fisted thematic guitar lines, ham-fisted drumming…ham-fisted everything. Can singing and production also be ham-fisted? If so, Diave commit these atrocities as well. They not only give a bad name to the gothic/death/doom genre, but also to hams and fists.
— Friar Wagner

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