SKULL591

SUSPENDED, Prelude to Indignance (2008, self-released)

The skull:
I love skulls that look like they were drawn in MS-Paint. Every element looks like it was added to distract from another, until you’re staring at a giant pile of mistakes feebly coalescing into a whole. What are those yellowish-brown things in the background? Chains? Made out of baby puke? And why is the skull glowing green? Just because it matches his eyes? And speaking of eyes, this skull must be baked, because his eyes are completely and comically bloodshot. He’s screaming because he can’t close his mouth (his fangs get in the way) and if you’re gonna gape, you might as well yell. Of course, the two headstocks (Jacksons, from the looks of it) poking out of the top can’t be comfortable, but this is a skull who is entirely unused to comfort anyway. I’d say the prelude is well over. This skull is very much indiginant, en ce moment.

The music:
Suspended walk a line between thrash and Death-worship, and while the playing and songwriting are a bit raw, the ideas and ambition are here. Vocalist Melynda Montano is the weak link; her gasping rasp is not particularly interesting in itself, and she has a tendency toward wordiness that overextends her voice in a bad way too often. You’ve heard worse singers, for sure, but that doesn’t offer much relief when you’re listening to Prelude to Indignance (which is a thrash title if ever I heard one.) One thing I can say about Suspended is that despite being a new thrash band, they don’t really sound like all the other new thrash bands, with their single-minded fixation on Slayer and Exodus. There’s a little bit of crossover to be heard here, but it’s an influence and not an aspiration. And there’s the aforementioned Schuldinerian vibe, with a lot of riffs reminding me of Chuck’s early forays into more melodic areas on Spiritual Healing. Suspended aren’t awesome, but they’ve got a lot of potential, and should be showing on your thrash radar, if you are so equipped.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL587

XCURSION, Xcursion (1983, Rampage)

The skull:
This EP is sometimes called Skull Queen for obvious and awesome reasons. Look at this thing! Although it’s obviously a cheap, one-piece plaster replica, the crowned ladyskull with diamond eyes is nevertheless a thing of beauty and a big dumb metaphor to boot (even if it could and should have been framed larger in the shot.) The presumably sumptuous, velvet pillow is icing, but for my money, the element that MAKES this cover is the grid. In the early 80s, “GRID = THE FUTURE” for some reason. Think Tron. Nowadays, you see something like this and you wonder, “What’s the deal with the grid?” but contemporary viewers in 1983 would have accepted it as a signifier that made sense. But even they might have noticed that the grid only goes back like 2 feet and scowled, because the whole point of these things was to suggest an ordered infinity, not a just an ordered few square meters. If nothing else, this Xcursion cover reminds us of the good ol’ days when, if you wanted a skull on your cover, you were just as likely to call a photographer as a painter. Nowadays, if you wanted an infinite grid, you could have it even if you started with this selfsame photo. But back then, budgetary and technological limits were as hard as the men who put skulls on their albums. Maybe even harder.

The music:
Xcursion’s claim to fame is that it was Mark Slaughter’s first band, but don’t hold the man’s subsequent poser activities against him when considering Xcursion, who were actually a fine heavy metal band. Through they hailed from Las Vegas, XCursion remind me more of early L.A. metal bands like Lizzy Borden, 3rd Stage Alert, Malice, etc, not to mention Detroit’s Seduce, whose first album is very much of a piece with Xcursion’s output. Recall, 1983 was before hair metal as we would grow to hate it became its own thing, and back then, legit metal bands might play songs titled, “Love Is Blind,” and even heavy bands would sometimes resort to hard rock stylings. Xcursion were not exactly master musicians, but they got the job done, and while Slaughter lacked the fine control he would later develop over his reedy falsetto, his young voice is nonetheless less shrill here than on “Fly to the Angels” or any of his other execrable hits. If you like early U.S. metal, then you’ll probably get a kick out of this. It’s hardly essential, but once you’ve collected all the classics, this is well worth tracking down. Xcursion’s complete works were “reissued” on Old Metal Records, but that disc is long out of print, and I’d imagine the LPs are even more scarce, so probably blogs and YouTube are your best bet for hearing this curious but of H.M. history.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL568

ROCK ROTTEN’S 9MM ASSI ROCK N’ ROLL, Fegefeuer (2007, Cargo)

The skull:
I’m pretty sure Rock Rotten acquired this painting, along with the name of his band and the title of his album, from some vendor at Sturgis. The art was airbrushed on leather, and framed. Mr. Rotten traded five replacement kaiser helmet spikes and a vintage Balls to the Wall backpatch for it. I’m told most of the songs on the album are actually about how much he misses that backpatch, but I can neither confirm nor deny this, as I only know as much German as needed to follow a handful of not-so-good Sodom songs, all of which are about bombs, and none of which are about assis.

The music:
This is just heavied-up AC/DC worship sung in German. So, like an even dumber Böhse Onkelz, basically. It’s weird how Germans will give pretty much any rock band a pass on quality so long as they sound like drunk guys singing into their steins. I personally can’t stand AC/DC, and I think even less of their clones, and drinking songs in all languages are idiotic, so this is pretty much torture for me. I guess if you’ve always thought Airbourne would be better with more umlauts, then be prepared to shake it for Rock Rotten.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL559

CROSSFIRE, Second Attack (1985, Mausoleum)

The skull:
Another fine architectural skull, to go with my personal favorite, Overkill’s The Years of Decay. Really, you can’t go wrong with a mysterious temple for your cover (see also: Borrowed Time by Diamond Head), and if that temple is also a skull, you’re pretty much set. The best thing about this particular temple is, of course, the goofy eyes. I imagine the court architect building this thing and inviting the head priest to a private unveiling, and the priest saying, “Jeez, man, this is pretty scary. This is a place of worship – we don’t want to turn people off. Can you do anything to tone it down a little? I mean, the skull is totally cool, and I love how the stairs go right into the mouth, that’s great, but I think that people are gonna be too scared to even think about coming in.” And because the architect serves at the pleasure of his religious leaders, he accordingly toned down the menace of his work, but in the most passive-aggressive, ‘fuck you’ way possible: with big googly eyes. Had he found a classier solution, maybe he wouldn’t have been the first human sacrifice offered in the new temple.

The music:
This is some fairly awesome Accept-style speed metal from Belgium. I had heard of Crossfire before, and had probably listened to a song or two, but I had never committed to listening to an entire album before now, and I must say, this is excellent stuff. The music is pretty standard mid-80s Belgian fare, played tight and fast, but the songs are very well written and Peter DeWint’s vocals are amazing, reminding me a bit of Perry McCarty (Warrior). This being an album from 1985, there are a couple leaden ballads, but the faster tunes, like “Atomic War,” “Feeling Down,” and the title track are all winners. Honestly, I’ve never been a big Accept fan, mainly because I think Udo’s singing is the pits, but if Restless and Wild were fronted by this guy, it would probably be an all-time favorite of mine. Now I’ve got to find this on CD, along with the other Crossfire albums. I’m sure that won’t be a brutal wallet reaming…
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL546

DEFLESHUARY, From Feast to Filth (2012, Sevared)

The skull:
Though the title might be making some sly comment on the value of bourgeois comestibles, which end up as shit no matter how fancy they begin on the plate, that point is somewhat undermined by the depiction of a feast that starts as filth. And honestly, who’s going to take seriously the social critique of a maggot muncher? Then again, it’s hard to guess if, in the death metal community, “maggot muncher” would be hurled as an insult, or lofted as a compliment.

The music:
With a name like Defleshuary, you’d expect some kind of gurgling goregrind, and not quirky, light prog metal with an emphasis on tricky drumming and acrobatic falsetto vocals. And of course you’d be right to expect that, because this is fucking Defleshuary. Goregrind is totally useless to me, a style that, when executed at the very highest level, merely elevates a band to “heard one, heard ’em all” status. By my reckoning, Defleshuary are, at their best, a reasonably good example of the form, but it’s a form I don’t need, and you probably don’t either. But, if you do, here’s your chance to own literally everything this band ever recorded, in one convenient package, including their contributions to the split CD Fermenting in Five-Way Filth, which I will admit is an excellent title. Those tracks are the latest on this comp, and definitely the best. Go back to their first demo, and you’re in for some really stupid mushmouthed nonsense, but if your in for a penny of goregrind, you’re in for a pound, I suppose.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL529

HELL MUÑECO, Doom Core (2009, demo)

The skull:
This guy reminds me of a Japanese Oni, what with his curved horns and fangs, not to mention the salacious look in his hideous peepers. With dentition like that, closing his mouth is probably next to impossible, but I imagine he gets by, mainly by screaming at all times and avoiding labial consonants. Then again, even if he could get his mouth shut, I guess the absence of lips would still make that sort of sound challenging, but other skulls manage to make them somehow. How, I don’t know! It’s times like this that make me wish we had a skull linguist on retainer to answer these burning questions.

The music:
Droopy doom metal with a cheap drum machine. Hell Muñeco are at least doom of the Solstice sort, and not a straight Sabbath knockoff, so you can expect riffing that’s a little more creative, and a little less reliant on the fuzz pedal for impact, than you get with your average weed-obsessed sludge merchant, but at the same time, the terrible vocals and Casio-grade drum samples really make this an unenjoyable listen, which is a pity because the writing and guitarwork are generally pretty solid, and certainly better than most of the doom bands we encounter around these parts. If the band found a stronger singer and a real drummer, they could probably grow into something interesting, but that could be said of an awful lot of bands, so I’m not holding out for a masterpiece from Hell Muñeco.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL453

PHANTASM, Keeper of Death (1993, Russian Disc)

The skull:
As promised with SKULL419, here is the successor to Russia’s Propeller. These guys really upgraded their aesthetics here. Of course, Phantasm is a much more awesome (if unoriginal) name than Propeller, and this skull is also mas macho. Whereas the Propeller pentagram was a kind of bladey thing, here we have barbed wire which is actually threaded through fissures in the skull (a nice touch!) Propeller featured what looked like a marionette skull, but Phantasm’s skull is clearly a badass dude. And while there’s still the issue of the too-big eyes, this guy makes up for it by dripping blood from his nose and mouth. Everything about this guy screams, “You motherfuckers thought you knew about death and pain? Well, you don’t know SHIT.”

The music:
Unfortunately, while Propeller got their look together when they changed to Phantasm, they sure as hell didn’t get their act in the studio together. This is the same kind of deathy thrash, but the sound is atrocious and the playing mysteriously sloppier. This was only recorded a year or so after that Propeller demo, but it sounds like it might have been made 5 years before. It’s a very strange regression for a band who, as of their demo, sounded like they knew what they were doing. That said, this being a proper LP and not a demo, it’s acquired a reputation as an underground classic in some circles, and if you like caveman death metal a la Master, then you might really go in for this, shitty production and all. Granted, you won’t find it for less than a small fortune, but spending hundred of bucks on a totally inessntial LP from Russia will make it sounds way more awesome, at least in your mind.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL419

PROPELLER, Always Say Die (1992, demo)

The skull:
Another skull on a pentagram. I’d yawn, but I am amused by this one. It looks like the skull of a marionette, Howdy Doody defleshed, with it’s squashed jaw and tiny teeth. Also, I like how the eyes are actually too big for the sockets, which is not how eyes work. Yes, when you look at a (living) person, you can’t see the entire sphere, because of the eyelids. Take away the lids, though, and the eyeball fits nicely into the socket, with no overhanging bone to obscure the top or the bottom. Consider this a humble anatomy lesson directed at all future Big Dumb Skull artists, because this eye thing is a very common mistake.

The music:
In 1992 would almost certainly have been called death metal, but in retrospect it sounds more like thrash than anything. A transitional form, basically. Think Beneath the Remains or Swallowed in Black. It’s a little more legitimately deathy than some stuff of this era, perhaps because Propeller lifts sometimes very literally from contemporary death metal bands (the bridge in “Brainsucker Spiders,” for instance, is stolen from “Immortal Rites” by Morbid Angel). Despite the drum machine, and despite coming out of Russian in 1992, this sounds fairly good, and for die-hard thrash fans, it wouldn’t be a bad thing to own, although I’m sure at this point, a download is your only option. The vocals are weak, but the riffing is good and they’ve managed to cobble together some reasonable compelling songs, if only with the help of their inspirations. After releasing this demo, the band changed names to Phantasm and released a single album, but that album also features a Big Dumb Skull, so look for it here in the (distant) future. This demo seems to be the better-sounding effort, though, and most of the songs on the LP are also here, so I guess this is the place to start.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL375

LUCIDO, Demo 2 (2007, Inquisitoris Ex Mundus Novus Productions)

The skull:
With its stark woodcut-style design, this is actually a very sharp, cool, distinctive skull. From the chin to the nose, there’s not much to say. The lower half looks nice, and if the artist had rendered the top half in the same style, this would still be a cut above most BDSes, but it appears that the acid kicked in around the time the artist got to the eyes, and he just rolled with it. The pentagram feels a bit forced, but those massive will-o-wisp eyes are awesome, and they make the whole cover. My hat goes off to you, unknown French metal demo cover artist!

The music:
I couldn’t find any music from this demo, but I was able to track down the band’s first demo (and only other release), the equally brilliantly titled Demo 2005. It’s weird sloppy French thrash metal with some punk and black metal influences. The vocals are a kind of blackish troll growl and are quite lame. The music is shambling and disorganized, but its made with the same buffoonish charm that animates, say, Obsessed by Cruelty. Of course, no one really likes music that inept as a rule, unless they first heard it as a kid or it was made long before they listened to metal. Coming out as this did in 2005, well, it’s a little late to the party. Lucido even seem to know this, as they labor to play messy music with something closer to the basic instrumental proficiency people demand these days, but trying to have it both ways never works well in these contexts. Lord knows where they went, musically from here, but Metal Archives seems to think they ended up playing black metal. If so, well, that was about the Frenchest thing this band could have done.
— Friar Johnsen

SKULL311

NUNSLAUGHTER, SathaSlaughter (2009, Universal Tongue)

The skull:
This poor guy’s eye is falling out, which is really not that surprising because he’s grotesquely deformed and nothing seems to fit together right. But, you’d think the other eye would be the first to go, considering how small it is compared to its socket. And while I know the thing surrounding the skull is probably supposed to be a cowl, it looks an awful lot to me like Jaws from the movie poster, so I imagine this guy thinking, “Aw shit! My eye just fell out! How could this day get any worse?” right before the Great White bites him in half.

The music:
Nunslaughter play time-capsule death metal, sounding perpetually like a Morbid Angel demo from 1987. Rude and crude death metal about how Jesus is a square. They’re the masters of the cult-of-limited-edition, releasing dozens on dozens on dozens of incredibly limited cassettes, 7″s, splits, EPs, live albums, etc. Someone once told me that the main Nunslaughter dude worked at a music repro plant, which is how he could afford to do all that shit. Probably they have more Big Dumb Skull covers, but we don’t have the patience to look for a better one than this, and this one is more than good enough. I don’t know how a person gets hooked on Nunslaughter in the first place, but once it happens, that person is in for a world of frustrating collection. Personally, I find their music to be unimaginative and dull, but for the style, it’s perfectly fine. If you want caveman death metal, they’re as good as anything, I suppose. This EP starts with a bunch of covers (all of them curated for maximum underground cred, of course, and including a version of “Jaws of Satan” by Sathanas, whose demo was, coincidentally, SKULL211) before wrapping up with a few songs they probably recorded seven or eight times elsewhere, like for some Romanian Tour EP limited to 27 cassettes. Somewhere out there is some insane superfan with every one of this band’s intentionally obscure releases, and that person must have the worst taste/judgment ever. I’d kind of like to meet him. How could he not be fascinating, on an anthropological level? And I wonder how long you could pronounce the band like “Nun’s Laughter” before he lost his shit?
— Friar Johnsen